Meeting people is never a bad thing as I’m always looking to gain experience in social situations with different types of people and hopefully improve my confidence.
I’ve now probably met dozens of people through the net- many of which are girls through dating sites and have been quite lucky to have had these experiences compared to my parent’s generation where there was no internet, or technophobes who don’t want to or think about using the net to meet people in real life.
For someone who spends most of this days indoors and shying away from anything remotely out of the ordinary, I first wish to congratulate myself for getting out, going to Hayes and meeting a very different type of girl.
O:
Ironically, O’s not very typical of most Japanese I’m familiar with- very outgoing and impolite at times though extroverted ignorance.
Physically she was a big disappointment when I saw her in the flesh compared to her photo. Yet there is something sexy about her and can’t put my finger on it. Perhaps her outgoing personality or asian/exotic looks?
Style-wise, I’ve seen worse, but I wasn’t impressed. Particularly at the fact she wore no make-up and a stained pair of tights! I made a lot of effort to wear nice things, clean my shoes and style my hair, so was gutted she hadn’t presented herself better. Apparently she’s into platform heels! Woulda loved to see her in some! Lol
The good thing is, she’s bright, fun, light hearted and up-beat. In one way her extroverted ignorance is good because she can’t read my inner insecurities. Hanging around with someone like that would probably do me good to balance me out and learn to effectively communicate with a different type.
Other than being incapable of appreciating her thinking and vice versa, her ‘ESTP’ abruptness and spontaneous outbursts are annoying and at times hurtful, even though I know she doesn’t mean to do it. She’s pretty inconsiderate and that’s totally not what I need from a relationship when I’m so insecure and self conscious. Because of her inconsiderate nature, she’s a pretty poor communicator despite the confidence.
Because she’s a do-er and very busy, she’s taken A LOT of action and got good at a lot of things- pro level at sports, music, business, languages and even winning at gambling, making money! It’s SERIOUSLY intimidating and makes me feel like a failure in comparison. What can I do- draw a half decent picture when I put my mind to it?
From her, and previous dates I learned:
- That I value style and making an effort with one’s appearance- especially in women.
- Femininity is important to me and anything that accentuates and outwardly expresses this is cool/sexy – make up, dresses, heels, hand bags, long hair.
- However, I dislike girlie or bimbo attitudes. Instead I am MASSIVELY into hot, sexy, feminine girls who love geeky male stuff like video games and scifi. They exist but are exceptionally rare!
- I am a great listener, great at making people feel comfortable, have a decent set of social skills and am very considerate, kind and emotionally giving as a person.
- I am not like many of these girls ex boyfriends who are described as narcissistic, aggressive, arseholes!
- Some personalities don’t like deep chats, so I don’t bother having them. I just keep these people as peripheral friends.
- I would often make a better boyfriend than they would a girlfriend.
- I feel I come across and behave A LOT better than how I think I will be like beforehand.
- I need to chill out, be in the moment and concentrate on fun more